Chapter 45 : Laws Pertaining to Zimun and Birkas Hamazon

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§1

Three men who have eaten together should recite Birkas Hamazon with Zimun, and it is a mitzvah to recite it over a cup of wine if possible. If wine is not available, beer, 'mead' or whiskey may be used, if they are common beverages of the locality. This is true in an area where grapevines do not grow within a day's distance from the city, and as a result, wine is expensive and therefore these other beverages are used instead of wine. Some authorities hold that even an individual reciting Birkas Hamazon should do so over a cup. It is the custom of those who are meticulous, when reciting Birkas Hamazon individually not to lift up the cup, but rather to place it on the table in front of them.

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§2

The cup is filled first and then the hands are washed.

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§3

If you drink some of the wine out of a cup whatever remains in it becomes blemished and is disqualified for use for Birkas Hamazon unless it is rectified by adding a little wine or water that is not blemished. Since the cup must be filled specifically for the sake of reciting a berachah, therefore, if the cup was blemished and you rectified it, you must pour it back into the bottle and from the bottle back into the cup for the sake of the berachah.

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§4

The cup used for the berachah must be whole, and even if the bottom base is broken, it is disqualified. Even the slightest notch in the rim of the cup or a crack in the cup disqualifies it. The cup must be rinsed from inside and washed from outside, or [if water is unavailable] it must be wiped clean. The beverage must be poured from the bottle for the purpose of reciting the berachah and the cup must be full. The one who leads the Birkas Hamazon should accept the cup in both hands to show his affection for the cup in that he longs to accept it with all his might as it is written: "Lift up your hands to the sanctuary and bless Hashem." He then removes his left hand and holds it only with his right hand without any help of the left (so it should not appear as a burden to him.) He should look at the cup so that he is not distracted, and he should hold it a tefach above the table, as it is written: "The cup of deliverance I will raise and upon the Name, Hashem, I will call." A left handed person should hold the cup in his "right" hand which is everyone else's left. It is proper to remove the empty dishes from the table [before Birkas Hamazon.]

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§5

If all those who are part of the group are of equal status and there is a kohein among the group it is a mitzvah to honor him with leading the Birkas Hamazon, as it is said: "You should sanctify him." But if there is a great Torah scholar in the group, he should lead the Birkas Hamazon. It is customary to have a mourner lead the Birkas Hamazon. This applies only when they are of equal status. It is also proper to honor with the leading of Birkas Hamazon, one who is generous, who despises illegal profits, and dispenses charity with his money, as it is written: "One who is generous shall be blessed." Do not read yevorach - "shall be blessed," but, rather, yevareich — "shall bless."

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§6

He who leads the Birkas Hamazon should begin by saying: "Come let us say the blessings," because all holy things require prior preparation. (He may also say in the Yiddish language Rabbosai, mir villen bentshen.) The rest of the assembled respond: Yehi sheim Hashem mevorach mei'ata ve'ad olam [Let the name of Hashem be blessed from now forever.] Then the leader says: Birshus maranan verabbanan verabbasai [With your permission, distinguished gentlemen] nevareich she'achalnu mishelo [Let us bless Him of whose bounty we have eaten] and the assembled respond baruch she'achalnu mishelo uvetuvo chayinu [Blessed is He of Whose bounty we have eaten and through whose goodness we live.] Then the leader repeats it and he also says: Baruch she'achalnu mishelo uvetuvo chayinu [Blessed is He of whose bounty we have eaten and through whose goodness we live.] In some communities the custom is that after the leader concludes uvetuvo chayinu: [And through Whose goodness we live,] the assembled respond Amein. In other communities, however, it is not the custom to respond Amein. There are also various customs in reference to saying: Baruch hu uvaruch shemo [Blessed is He and blessed is his Name.] Some have the custom that the leader says it [even] where only three men are present; whereas, others hold that it should not be said unless there are ten men present, because then Hashem's Name is mentioned, and it may be said. This is the proper custom. The assembled should not say it, and, certainly, one who recites Birkas Hamazon without zimun should not say it.

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§7

The leader should say the Birkas Hamazon aloud, and the assembled should quietly repeat every word with him, and at the end of each berachah they should hasten to finish [their berachah] before the leader so that they may respond Amein to his berachah.

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§8

After Birkas Hamazon the leader makes a berachah on the cup over which he said Birkas Hamazon and drinks a revris from it, so that he may recite the after-berachah [over the wine]. If the [contents of] cups of those assembled have become blemished, the leader should pour some of his [wine] into their cups after he recites the berachah Borei peri hagafen, [but] before he drinks from it, so that they, too, may say a berachah over cups that are not blemished. Similarly, if their cups are empty, he should, likewise, pour into them a little from the cup over which the berachah was said, but they should not taste of it until he who said the berachah tastes of it. But, if each of them have their own cups which are not blemished, the leader need not give them from his cup and they may taste of theirs before he tastes of his. If possible, the proper way [of doing it] is that each one should have a full cup.

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§9

If the leader does not wish to drink from the cup, some authorities hold that he may give it to one of the other assembled guests to recite the blessing Borei peri hagafen and drink a reviis and recite the concluding berachah. Other authorities hold that this should not be done, rather, the one who leads the Zimun should recite the berachah over the cup, and this is the proper way.

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§10

If two men eat together it is a mitzvah for them to seek a third to join them for a Zimun. If the third person came after the two have already finished eating, and some additional food were brought to them as a dessert and they would eat it, then it is a mitzvah for them to invite this third person for zimun. They should give him a kazayis of food for which he would be required to recite a concluding berachah, and then he can join them for Zimun. Some authorities hold that the third person must eat bread; and others hold that any kind of grain food suffices. There are even those who hold that fruit and vegetables are sufficient; and still others who hold even if he does not eat [food], but merely drinks a revris7 of any kind of beverage except water, he may join them for Zimun, and this is the accepted practice. And though he didn't eat, but only drank, he can still say "[Blessed is He from whose bounty] we have eaten" since drinking is included in the category of eating. After the berachah Hazan es hakkol, [Who nourishes all] he [the third person] should recite the concluding berachah over what he ate or drank; [however] if the third person arrived after the other two already washed their hands with the water that concludes [the meal], he can no longer join them.

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§11

If three men eat together. since they are required to form a Zimun, they are not allowed to separate. The same applies when four or five people eat together, not even one of them is allowed to recite Birkas Hamazon privately, because all of them are obligated in this Zimun. If the group consists of six or more but less than ten, they may separate in such a manner that there remains a Zimun for each group.

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§12

If ten men eat together they must add Hashem's Name [to the Zimun]; that is, the leader says: Nevareich Elokeinu [Let us bless our God] she'achalnu mishelo [of whose bounty we have eaten], but he should not say: nevareich Leilokeinu [Let us say a blessing to our God]; and the assembled respond: Baruch Elokeinu she'achalnu mishelo [Blessed is our God of whose bounty we have eaten.] Since they must recite Zimun with Hashem's Name, they are forbidden to separate unless there are twenty or more; then they may separate in such manner that each group remains with enough to have Zimun with Hashem's Name.

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§13

If the leader of the Zimun of ten errs, and the respondents erred as well and forgot to say the Name of Hashem as part of the Zimun, they cannot repeat the Zimun with Hashem's Name, since they already fulfilled their obligation of Zimun, except that they negated the mitzvah of mentioning Hashem's Name, which is an error that cannot be corrected. But if the respondents have not yet responded, since they have not yet fulfilled the obligation of Zimun, the leader should repeat the Zimun and include Hashem's Name.

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§14

If seven own ate bread and three ate fruit or drank beverages in sufficient amounts to obligate them to make an after-berachah, they may recite Zimun with Hashem's Name. (In this case everyone agrees that it is sufficient even if some had only fruit or drink). It is a mitzvah to look for ten men in order to recite Hashem's Name. However. if only six ate bread, they cannot recite Zimun with Hashem's Name, because a substantial majority is required.

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§15

As long as men eat together, even if they don't eat the whole meal together but they sat down to eat together and recited the berachah Hamotzi, even if each one of them ate from his own loaf, since they established themselves together, whether three or ten, they are not permitted to separate. Even if one of them wants to finish his meal before the others, they are not permitted to separate. But if they did not establish themselves from the beginning of the meal, rather after two of them ate, even if they ate only a kazais and a third person came and joined them, if he finishes his meal with them, they are all required to recite the Zimun. But if the third person wants to finish his meal before them, since he did not start with them or finish with them, he is permitted to separate from them and recite Birkas Hamazon privately. Nevertheless, it is a mitzvah to wait in order to recite the Zimun. If there are extenuating circumstances or he fears the possibility of incurring a loss, even if he joined them at the beginning of the meal, he may finish his meal before the others and recite Birkas Hamazon privately. But if the need is not urgent, he must wait for the group.

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§16

If three men ate together and one of them forgot and recited Birkas Hamazon privately, they may still recite the Zimun even after he finishes reciting Birkas Hamazon. And he may also respond Baruch she'achalnu, but if this third person had already joined the Zimun with two others, he can no longer join with the first group for Zimun. If two of the three recited Birkas Hamazon, even privately, the Zimun is defunct.

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§17

If three men ate together and two finished their meal and want to say Birkas Hamazon, and one of them has not yet finished his meal and does not want to say Birkas Hamazon, he, nevertheless, must interrupt his meal so they may say Birkas Hamazon with Zimun. He should answer with them and fulfill his obligation of Zimun. He should wait until the leader concludes the berachah Hazan es hakkol, and then resume his meal. He does not have to recite another berachah before eating since it was his intention to continue eating. After finishing his meal, he should say Birkas Hamazon privately. But two people need not interrupt their meal for the sake of one, unless they wish to do so in his honor, [as an act] beyond the letter of the law. If ten men ate together, four must interrupt their meal for the sake of six because they are the majority. But they need only wait until the leader says: Baruch Elokeinu [Blessed is our God.] After they finish their own meal, they should form their own Zimun without mentioning Hashem's Name.

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§18

At larger banquets where there are many guests, it is proper to choose someone to lead Birkas Hamazon who has a powerful voice so that all the assembled can hear the leader recite at least until after the berachah, Hazan es Hakkol. If that is impossible, they should recite Birkas Hamazon in smaller groups of ten.

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§19

Two groups that eat in one house or in two houses, if part of each group see one another, they may join to form a Zimun. If they cannot see each other, each group forms their own Zimun. If there is one waiter for both groups, he is the means of joining them, provided they originally came with the intention of combining into one group. Whenever two groups join, they must all be able to hear the leader recite at least until after the berachah Hazan es hakkol.

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§20

If you are with a group that is saying Zimun and you did not eat or drink with them, when you hear the leader say, Nevareich she'achalnu mishelo [Blessed is He from whose bounty we have eaten] you should respond, Baruch umevorach shemo [Blessed is His Name] tamid le'olam va'ed [forever and ever]. If it is a Zimun of ten and the leader, therefore, says: Nevareich Elokeinu [Let us bless Our God], you should also respond: Baruch Elokeinu [Blessed is our God] umevorach shemo [and blessed is his Name] tamid le'olam va'ed [forever and ever.] If you arrive after the leader has already said Nevareich [Let us bless, etc.], and you hear the respondents saying: Baruch she'achalnu [Blessed is He, etc.], or Baruch Elokeinu she'achalnu [Blessed is our God, etc.], you should [only] say Amein.

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§21

If three men ate together, each from his own bread, and one of them ate bread of a non-Jew, and the other two are careful not to eat bread of a non-Jew, nevertheless, they can combine for Zimun. The leader should be the one who ate the non-Jewish bread, because he can eat together with the others. If one ate dairy foods and two ate meat, they may combine, and the leader should be the one who ate dairy foods, because he may eat with the others. But if the one who ate dairy foods doesn't drink wine or if all that is available is beer which is chadash, and he is careful not to eat chadash, then it is better for the leader of the Zimun to be one of those who ate meat, and have Birkas Hamazon said over a cup [of beverage] rather than to recite it without a cup. If one person ate hard cheese and the other two ate meat, some authorities hold they cannot combine into one group, while others hold that they may combine, since they could all eat from the same loaf of bread. We may accept the lenient opinion in this matter.

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§22

If women ate together with men who were obligated in Zimun, they, too, are required to say Zimun and they must listen to the saying of Zimun. In reference to a minor, it is customary not to include him for Zimun until he is thirteen years and one day old. Then he can join and even lead the Zimun, even though it was not ascertained that he has grown two pubic hairs. [This is a necessary requisite if one is to be considered an adult according to halachah.]

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§23

If someone does not recite the Shema morning and evening, or one who publicly violates the mitzvos, cannot be counted for Zimun. A true convert may be counted for Zimun and he may lead and say: "For your parceling out as a heritage to our fathers" because it is written about our father, Abraham, "A father to many nations have I made you." And our Rabbis explain: "In the past you were merely a father to Avram, but from now on [you are a father] of all nations.